A friend of mine died. She was a beautiful person. She was sincere and a fighter who had overcome a lot in her life. It was such a senseless loss. (Is there a loss that isn't senseless?) I didn't and still don't see any great lesson to learned from it. Frankly, it pisses me off. It seems cruel. It is cruel.
No great lesson here, no epiphanies. I'm at a loss.
No great lesson here, no epiphanies. I'm at a loss.
6 comments:
My thoughts are with you Angel.
Thanks, Kahless. I'm not hurting like her children are, though. They need their mum every day.
If I get cranky about things I think about how she would like to have a bad day again just so she could be with her children. Yet there are abusive parents who get entire lifetimes with their children. Clearly I'm at the angry stage and I think I may be here a little while.
I'm upset too that we both put ourselves at the end of our "to do" lists, always thinking that anything that seemed indulgent (like our getting together, two moms just to talk and do girly things) could be put off. We'll get together next week--no, the next week--no, how about the week after that? The next thing you know, it's been months and then...it's too late. Regret.
I'm so sorry, Angel. I was just thinking earlier about two dear friends that I lost to death. One of them would be my neighbor now if she were still alive. Sometimes I think about what that would have been like. I think about her whenever I see her daughter walking the dog. I wonder what it would be like to look from the dog to its human companion and see her holding the leash. I dreamed of her last year. I dreamed about her dog, too.
I'm so sorry. If you can learn to put yourself first and take time for yourself, then you will be doing well. I bet that is what your friend would want for you.
I'm so sorry for your friend's loss. It just doesn't seem fair.
I'm so sorry.
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